How to initiate divorce

If you are in a bad relationship and want out...here are some proven ways to help speed the process of getting a divorce.


Male:
Always drink directly from the milk carton
Female:
Leave milk in the cabinet several days before refrigerating

Male:
Always leave the toilet seat in the up position and never flush. Better yet --- remove the toilet seat.
Female:
Decorate the bathroom in all pink including a fluffy pink toilet seat cover.

Male:
Never fill up the ice cube trays.
Female:
Season the ice with cayenne pepper.

Male:
Do you wife's laundry and use lots of bleach.
Female:
Wash your husband’s white briefs with all your reds.

Male:
Drink a lot
Female:
Drink his beer.

Male:
If you don’t smoke. Start.
Female:
Stop brushing your teeth.

Male:
When not smoking…chew tobacco
Female:
Eat lots of garlic

Male:
Start snoring. If you already snore…snore louder.
Female:
Wear flannel pjs and curlers to bed.

Male:
Invite the dog to bed.
Female:
Hog the sheets.

Male:
Quit mowing the grass.
Female:
Quit paying the bills

Male:
Quit taking out the trash.
Female:
Quit cleaning the house

Male:
Pick your nose
Female:
Bite your nails and then eat them

Male:
Leave the newspaper scattered all over the floor.
Female:
Throw away the sports section.

Anyone who knows me, is aware that I believe in the sanctity of marriage. This list was generated by my husband and myself. He came up with the male perspective, of course. We had a good laugh putting this list together.

Remember in a marriage you need to be full of forgiveness, encouragement and love.

And trying to keep your bad habits to a minimum.

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